i hope that, wherever my hair ties go, they’re happy. that’s all that matters
movie theaters are actually really cute like a bunch of strangers come together to watch a movie together with snacks and candy and laughing and crying aw good job movie theaters i see what you did there
spaghettimurphy said: You're absolutely stunning. What's a funny sex story you've experienced?
you’re too sweet!! cc: oh gosh this is fun lets see
alright… so this is by far the most embarrassing:
i was in a relationship with a boy for about six months i’d say, and he was a year younger than me and a virgin when we first started seeing each other. anyway, about a month in we were home alone at his house. we were in his room watching a movie or something and me, being the little innocence-destroyer that i was, started tracing my fingers on his lower stomach and all that jazz. anyway, after things go sort of heated he looked at me and said, “alright, champ, lets do this”. it’s hard to say no to that.
anyway, we didn’t use a condom at first just because in the heat of the moment it didn’t seem necessary and in all honesty, i thought we’d stop after a minute in and put one on. i believed that so strong that after no more than 60 seconds i got off of him and said, “okay… well…” and he said, “yeah, i’m sorry”. at that point i had no idea what he was talking about and i was like, “no no we just have to get a condom, don’t worry!” and then the fateful moment came.
"wait…… you’re not on birth control?" and he fucking ROCKETED out of the bed. i’ve never seen someone jump to their feet that quickly and he just starts pacing and saying, "oh my god holy shit oh my god i’m so sorry i already came i can’t be a dad i live at my moms house holy fuck what do we do can we wash it out oh my god i’m not fit to be a father do you understand i can’t do laundry we’re gonna have to buy a crib"
I FUCK YOU NOT HE SAID WE WERE GOING TO HAVE TO BUY A CRIB
so, suffice it to say, we purchased plan b and that’s a funny sex story, aside from being catastrophically ridiculous and stupid.
Life is so hard when your best friend is a 9.5/10 and you’re a strong 4 with the right filter and lighting
wow you drink so much water, you're so healthy!!
i cry so much i gotta stay hydrated